ThanksKilling Drinking Game

ThanksKilling Title

It's no secret that ThanksKilling is probably my favorite movie. My ringtone is the theme song. My text message sound is Turkie saying "Gobble, gobble." (I cut the "mother fucker" part. I don't need that happening during a meeting with my boss.) When I got my DVD, I wanted to watch it again, but how would I get everyone to watch it with me again. They'd probably need to be drunk. Wait a minute!

The Game

A quick Web search brought me to the ThanksKilling Drinking Game. It's the only post that isn't "Hello World!" The post says:

Thanks Killing is a great movieā€¦ The list below will get you drunk... Please let me know if you have anything to add...

1: See Turkey

2: College kid meets demise

3: Anyone says Thanksgiving

4: Anyone Falls

5: Nudity

6: Bad one liners... (you will know when you hear it)

7: Turkey Swears

8: Beastiality

Drinking games have to be simple to remember. There are unrealistic ones that have a thousand rules, and there are the plausible ones. This doesn't seem too bad. I decided that I'd check it out. How many drinks will this games result in? Let's find out with a bottle of Wild Turkey.

Trigun - Wild Turkey
By the way, this is the way you'll have to drink if you try to make it to the end of the movie.

The Tweaks

There are some rules that are vague. My count used these rules:

  1. See Turkey Turkie
    • It doesn't count if it is part of the same scene. Otherwise, jump cuts would be fatal.
    • Turkie in the Sheriff disguise counts, but you may not recognize him if you're playing this game right.
  2. College kid meets demise
    • Parents and the man who stops to pick up Turkie while hitch-hiking don't count.
  3. Anyone says Thanksgiving
  4. Anyone Falls
    • I didn't count when Billy rolled off the log laughing at Kristen or when Turkie is launched by a shotgun blast.
  5. Nudity
    • I decided to include topless men once Billy took off his shirt. As I side effect, that meant I also included Grant.
    • Anyone naked but covering up counts (during the animation).
    • Ali isn't actually exposed at all during the sex scene.
  6. Bad one liners... (you will know when you hear it)
    • Any pun counts.
  7. Turkey Turkie Swears
  8. Beastiality

The Data

ThanksKilling - Turkie and Sheriff

See Turkie

Total: 17 drinks

College kid meets demise

Total: 5 drinks

Anyone says Thanksgiving

Total: 7 drinks

Anyone Falls

Total: 4 drinks


Total: 5 drinks

Bad one liners

Total: 15 drinks

Turkey Swears

Total: 23 drinks


Total: 2 drinks

Total of All Rules

78 drinks in about one hour!

Thankskilling - Darren Reaches for Help
Warning: That amount of drinking may put a hole in your stomach.


I wrote all the data down. I may as well complete the nerd-dom and chart it out.

ThanksKilling Drinking Game - Chart 1

ThanksKilling Drinking Game - Chart 2


Take shots of cheap beer. This might have to happen a few days before Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving itself will be reserved for ThanksKilling 2!

ThanksKilling - Finished Puppet
I can't wait to see this puppet's successor!

Most images in this article are from the official ThanksKilling photo gallery.